Ethan's Web (Part 7)

The past couple of weeks has been filled with hard work and determination. Ethan goes to therapy every Tuesday and Thursday and works incredibly hard at his ultimate goal; walking. For 90 minutes he works each and every muscle group; lifting, stretching, climbing, pushing, pulling, etc. He has the type of workout that would put me on the bench. This is him working in 'the cage'. He is working on all the muscles he needs for walking; all of those extensor muscles along your spine, hips, and legs that help you to stand up straight and balance. The lovely woman with him is Heather, his physical therapist. Just below are Kevin and Heather who are in the midst of talking about how they can work Ethan in a way that will target his muscle groups that still need to be strengthened. They are always coming up with fresh ideas that help Ethan to get stronger.
And it is working! We are beginning to see results. Ethan is standing taller, walking stronger, and improving the way that he walks. Before therapy Ethan would always walk with his right foot to the side and push off on the inside of his foot. Just within the past week he has been relearning how to walk from heel to toe and keeping his feet straight. At first, we were reminding him all the time through out the entire day. I sounded like a drill sargent constantly telling the soldier to 'keep his foot straight'. But by weeks end he was walking with his foot straight and the drill sargent was able to rest her voice. We are constantly working towards our goal. In the past (only about a year ago) Ethan would complain and whine about having to do therapy. This time it is different. There is a determination in his eyes that I have never seen before. Every time he is able to do something he has never been able to do before he smiles. It is the kind of smile that starts out small at the corners of his mouth and then when he begins to realize he is REALLY DOING IT (whatever it may be, ie. lifting his leg to the side, standing for over a minute, keeping his foot straight) his face just explodes with light and a giggle that is trying to contain his excitement. I'm not sure why but he is very humble about his accomplishments. Maybe it is because he is embarrassed by his Mom who is usually the one in the background jumping up and down and cheering like her son just scored the winning goal for the Stanley Cup! But seriously, there is a light in his eyes that I have never seen before. And he is constantly showing his determination every day, wherever we may go and with whatever we may be doing.

For example, Aiden (Ethan's younger brother) had soccer camp this week. On the first day of practice we arrived at the field to find that in order to get to the area where he would be playing soccer we would have to walk down 25 steps on a large steep hill and across a field about the size of a football field away. My first thought was, "Oh my, Ethan is going to have to wait at the top of the hill while I take Aiden over with Eleanor." But Ethan declined the offer to just wait and tried his hardest to keep up with us. Of course he did too. Every day thereafter became an on the spot therapy session. Ethan was determined to walk down the steps and sometimes walk across the field and every day he would have to walk back across the field and back up those 25 steep steps. Not only did he just have to walk up those steps but he had to consciously think about where he was placing his feet and arm crutches in every moment. Remember, he had a habit of placing his foot to the side when he walks so every day and in every moment he was consciously choosing to straighten his foot and relearn the pattern of walking that he had been using for so long. It was amazing to watch the strength and determination resonate from this little boy. Of course, he had his mom back there cheering him on and telling him when his foot was crooked or straight and Eleanor (Ethan's 3 year old sister) even cheered him on to keep going when he was getting tired. She would come over to him look him straight in the eye as she crouched down to get right in his face and say, "Come on Ethan, you can do it!" I would just smile and thank God that we never have to do this alone. By the end of the week Ethan was beginning to master his new walking pattern and the steps had become allot easier to climb. Ironically, Ethan was rewarded in a most unusual way!

Several of the coaches had noticed Ethan throughout the week. One day, one of the coaches asked if Ethan would be interested in a mini private soccer lesson. "Just to kick the ball around", as he said. I asked Ethan that day and he seemed very hesitant. He didn't want to have a lesson. I think he felt pretty self conscious about the whole thing. So, I let it go and prayed that if this was supposed to happen that it would come together easily. The next morning, Ethan asked me, "Mom, do you remember when that man asked if I wanted to do that thing you were talking about?" "You mean the soccer lesson?", I replied. "Yeay", he said. "I want to do it." He remarked with a tiny smile beginning to form on the corners of his mouth. "Ok, let me see what can be done." I said. By this time it was the last full day of camp and everyone was busy trying to finish their agendas. I just prayed again asking for this to be done if it was supposed to be and the opportunities began to fall into place for Ethan. The camp director approached me about an email I had sent the night before, thanking him for the offer and declining the invitation for a mini soccer lesson. Ironically, I had confused one of the coaches as the camp director and sent the email to the wrong person. Well, the director approached me and started talking about how they wanted to start a soccer program for kids with special needs and that he knows I had mistaken him for someone else but that this had sparked his interest in the possibility of developing a program. I told him that Ethan had changed his mind since yesterday and that he now wanted to kick a ball around. Before we knew it, Ethan had 5 coaches around him teaching him some key soccer techniques and Ethan taught them how much he really CAN do. Ethan was thrilled! For 20 minutes he was surrounded by a bunch of guys eager to see him succeed. It was thrilling and inspiring to watch. They were amazed at what Ethan could do and Ethan was amazed at what they could do. By the time they were done Ethan went home with a camp t-shirt (just like all the other campers) and a camp soccer ball. You should have seen his face when they told him he could have a soccer ball. At home that evening soccer camp was all we could talk about at the dinner table. Both Ethan and Aiden couldn't wait to get done with dinner so that they could take their Dad out to the back yard and play 2 on 1 soccer. For almost an hour I heard screams of laughter as the kids continued to play and finally won the soccer game against their Dad. The next day Ethan wore his soccer camp shirt to the family day and final day of soccer camp.

These past couple of weeks have been full of wins for Ethan. His wins have helped our entire family. There is no doubt that Ethan will achieve everything he sets out to do. Every time I question whether or not we are on the right path or if Ethan will ever walk, run or have bowel and bladder continence I am given a rose in some form. I ask God to show me clearly and the roses come. They come when I least expect them and then I suddenly remember that I had just asked for confirmation 15 minutes ago, an hour ago, or earlier that day. It is an unexplainable 'feeling' inside a 'knowing' that it will all work out and that Ethan is miraculously healing before our very eyes. Six years ago, I had a vision of a little boy about 8 or 9 years old running down a ramp to a man in a canoe. I was across the lake watching from the shore as this young boy climbed into the boat. When I took a closer look I saw that the boy was Ethan and the man in the canoe was my husband, Andy. This vision has kept me going and it has kept me believing all these years. Jesus once said, "Don't be afraid; just believe." With this, we put all our fears aside and we know that all we have to do is "just believe".